the start of exploring what makes me who I am.
When I was 12 years old, I made a decision to be vegan. I grew up vegetarian and so was used to thinking about what went into my body and the consequences that the decisions I made in that regard might have externally to me and my personal bubble of interest. As a very moralistic and self-righteous youth, guided by reason and a strong sense of justice, I was fascinated to discover that not only could one stop eating animals as a way to end unnecessary suffering, one could also stop eating their products, and in doing so, avoid contributing to the horrors of factory farming.
At the time of making this decision, the pieces simply fell into place. Having travelers staying in our family home, I was exposed to the idea of veganism and its justification. I simply put a classic Peter Singer type argument together in my head:
This argument relied on a rational decision making process in order to deal with the emotionally driven impulse to be a moral agent. I still stand by my decision and since making this decision I have seen many others make the same argument, come to the same conclusion, and make the same decision.
In terms of whether veganism is the most ethical choice that a person can make, I would say, "Probably not, but humans seem to like clarity." We like to have a line in the sand that tells us what we can and can't do - or maybe that's just me! Sometimes it might be more ethical to accept someones warm hospitality and eat a little meat. Sometimes it may be more ethical to eat local animal products rather than eating mass produced mono-cropped soybeans.
I do think that the decision to be vegan is a black and white one. One could argue that it is contingent, and that a more nuanced approach is more ethical and more rational, but I believe that the net positive outcome of being vegan outweighs the negatives.
I grew up in a Pākehā household in the country side of Aotearoa. My dad commuted to Pōneke every day to work at the bank, Monday to Friday, 9-5. Although my mum was there to look after us for most of my childhood, she was always had side hustles or voluntary work which kept her permanently on her toes. I learnt from my upbringing that it is important to work hard, show effort and strive for high standards. In school I was praised from a young age for my intellect and enjoyed reading and doing mathematics, even in my free time!
Attending a Steiner school, creativity and developing a breadth of skills was encouraged. I love learning about the idea of the Renaissance man - someone who is a polymath, highly skilled in many areas. I loved to draw, sew, sculpt, play sports and play imaginary games with my friends.
My best friend Acacia and other friends encouraged my creativity through music and my family supported my musical passions by sending me to music lessons throughout school.
A core part of my childhood was having WWOOFers (World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms) stay with my family. Every few weeks we would have a couple of new travelers staying with us from all across the globe (but mostly Germans). These travelers provided a lens into the cultures of the world, sharing food, traditions and language with us around a family dinner table. I think this grew the strength in me of seeing things from other perspectives, of understanding difference and embracing diversity.
When I left the Steiner school I was enthralled with the world, and being outside the bubble that had shaped my life up until that point. I was very interested in rebellious street cultures like graffiti and deep philosophical questions of existentialism, meaning and metaphysics.
Through pursuing a design degree at Toi Whakaari: The New Zealand Drama School, I honed some of my design skills and identified some themes that would resonate throughout my life including feminism, beauty standards and religious/cult themes and iconography.
At Toi Whakaari I also met one of my closest friends Ivo, who would entirely change the way I thought about the world. I became less self-righteous morally, but maybe more so intellectually, started to question the meaning of EVERYTHING, and gave up on many of my ideals (while still secretly holding on to them). I started to think solid justifications were vital to having an opinion about anything.
After a few years post-degree roaming around being a free spirit and not wanting to pursue a career in the field of Design for Stage and Screen I got bored and decided to study philosophy. My friends Tahua and Leo and many of my philosophy professors have helped me to hone my critical thinking and argument skills. Philosophy also introduced me to logic and logic lead me into computer science, woohoo! I value Academic Excellence and held myself to a high standard during my studies at Auckland University.
The last vital thing that has shaped me is my network of loving, supportive and inspiring friends. My friends are the people that I share everything with, who are there for my roller coaster of emotions, and who are also keen for shenanigans of many descriptions. They show me what love and connection looks and feels like, and how to be open, supportive, creative and intelligent.
Wow, I could write so much more about this but I feel as if I should have written so much less!
I think I am respectful of others and have the ability to understand where different people are coming from. I think this will benefit me in teamwork and getting along with people that I am working with.
I have a high standard for my own work and an appreciation for excellence and beauty. I think that this will drive me to execute tasks and projects to the best of my ability.
I am curious and eager to learn. I think that this is a strength that will allow me to remain open to new experiences and knowledge, and will also help encourage me to stay engaged with the learning that is presented.
VIA strengths profile:
It is interesting to note that out of all the strengths on the VIA Character Strengths Profile the last strength on my list was Modesty. This is interesting because I have suffered from very intense Imposter Syndrome in jobs and educational environments previously. I think I often know that I am adept at things, but the expectations that I put on myself causes me to doubt myself and my abilities.
I think that I have a sensitive ego and can struggle to take criticism onboard in a healthy manner. I often take small mistakes that I have made to be grand failures. This is something that I am seeking to work on and address - being comfortable with not knowing everything.
I have struggled in group projects such as a project I took last year in logic class. Although I wanted to be engaged in the project, I struggled to engage with some of my teammates. They weren't responsive to my attempts to inspire a joint effort on the project. I felt it quite difficult not to take responsibility for everyone in the group. My strategy was to try and open up space for others within the group to take initiative. The workload ended up being distributed between myself and one other student, and I took onboard the technical content as best I could, because I felt that no one else was pulling their weight.
I think this strategy was okay, but I also think that it would have been helpful to really plan out the project at the beginning and distribute the responsibilities more clearly between team members, so that it was clear who was responsible for what. I took on so much stress because I wanted our team to succeed, despite the lack of effort from other team members. I think that in the future I could create better internal boundaries for myself, so that I do not take on the responsibility for other people.